Hey Todd, wow, good on you! It took so much courage to put yourself out here and write this post. But you’ve done it! :) I love your honesty and appreciate your vulnerability. It is never easy to share your fears and weaknesses with anyone — but you’ve done it.
Re. thinking you’re bothering people by asking for help, why not think of it a different way: people love to feel wanted. To feel useful. And to be appreciated. You are giving them the opportunity by asking for help.
Re. not feeling good enough, who does? We all don’t feel good enough, deep down. Some of us are better at faking it than others. And some of us are getting better at being more gentle, compassionate, and kind to ourselves so we start to believe we are good enough (and always have been).
Re. fumbling your words, don’t worry about that. There’s a wonderful saying by Maya Angelou something to the effect of this: “People won’t remember your words — but they will remember the way you make them feel”.
Todd, write the way you sing. With your heart.
Cheers! :)